Jeremy Pryzby aka igorponweed

Wii Music (2008)

Published February 20, 2010

Wow. I imagined the game would be bad, but the end product is just horrid! I wasn't going to buy this in the first place, but I got a really awesome offer for my Nintendo DS Browser, an then traded the unwanted game for a SNES. When the game came, I figured that I'd give it a try with a friend. And it was painful.

The game works by you shaking the Wii remote to the tune of the song, and you can press different buttons to improvise. Even worse, apparently the big N doesn't have enough money from the insane success of the Wii and DS for any licensed songs. It's all public domain songs and a couple of Nintendo's game's themes. And worse still, the instruments range from Sitar to Cheerleader. And last but not least, this game lets you grade yourself. So what is there to aspire to? The muppet-looking guy will be just as happy whether you give a toddler the controls and rate 100, or give it to the most advanced Wii Music player in the universe and rate it the same.

Lets recap. So far, you shake the Wii remote to make your Mii cheer to the tune of "Twinkle Twinkle", and then rate yourself perfectly. If that sounds fun to you, sue your doctor for the unsuccessful lobotomy. But not all hope is lost! There are mini-games! Those are always fun, right?

The first mini-game is about ringing bells. You shake the corresponding Wii remotes when the bell icon hits the bell-shaped slots. You can also have friends ring different bells the same way. This is about as boring as it sounds, but it's better than the main game, because it actually has an objective. Next is pitch perfect, where you match up Miis that sound the same, put them in order from highest to lowest sounds, or arrange them to make a song. This game is actually fun. Nothing you need to own, or should spend $20 on, but it's fun. Another game included is a game where you conduct an orchestra by swinging the controllers to the rhythm of the song. This is actually my favorite of all of them, surprisingly. It's actually rather addictive. But once again, it's not worth $20.

Last comes the drums game, where you step on the balance board as a pedal, and use the controllers as drumsticks. But in order to hit different parts of the drum you must hold down different buttons as you swing, and that's pretty freaking difficult.

Overall, while the mini-games are somewhat enjoyable, I still cannot recommend this to anyone with a straight face. If your looking for something to flail around that makes noise you should just buy a tambourine for about 50 cents at a thrift store, and if your looking for an engaging rhythm game, just go buy one of the Rock Band games. But stay far, far away from Wii Music.